Got #FOMO? Strategies for dealing with the Fear of Missing Out

March 24, 2021
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March 24, 2021
By Angel Evans, Claire Howarth, Kristina Jagassar, and Sarah Syrett

This article is based on a workshop hosted by the Accessible Learning Centre and the Student Wellness Centre on March 10, 2021.

Almost everyone experiences the fear of missing out (FOMO) from time to time. It has become a meme and hashtag that has not only made its way onto social media platforms across the world, but also into our lives.  In this article we will go beyond the hashtag to explore FOMO, understand how to identify it, and share helpful strategies for coping.

What is FOMO?

You’re probably most familiar with FOMO from social media.  A quick search of the hashtag on Twitter shows new posts every day.  It is everywhere, but what is it?   FOMO is defined by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary as “the fear of not being included in something (such as an interesting or enjoyable activity) that others are experiencing.”  Although FOMO may seem like it just exists on social media, the feeling does have very real impacts on health and wellness.

A Brief History

Did you know that the term FOMO has been around for over twenty years?  Its first use was documented in 2000.  University students used it in 2004 to refer to a phenomenon at Harvard Business School where students were looking to experience as much as possible.  Facebook launched at Harvard in 2004, and with its creation, FOMO spread across the world.

Types and Indicators of FOMO

FOMO can be seen in social and academic situations and has been very common during the COVID-19 pandemic.  It is based on social comparisons and can include a feeling of loss for what could have been.  You might scroll through social media and see your friends out together, and even though you decided to stay in, you feel worried or stressed that you are not there with them.  FOMO becomes a cycle that causes you to feel you always need to be online, scrolling through social media to see what others are doing in case you miss something.  This behaviour also helps to re-affirm identities and self-esteem which can lead to further experiences of FOMO.

There is also academic FOMO.  Students might feel like there is a pressure to “keep up” with others or that they are not getting enough experiences and falling behind their classmates.  Imposter syndrome might also arise in academic FOMO, which is feeling like everyone else is more qualified than you are, that others may have a misperception of you, and that you are an imposter. Most people experience it from time to time; you are not alone if you are feeling this way!

FOMO has also been pervasive during the COVID-19 pandemic.  It can be overwhelming to try to absorb the constant news updates and keep on top of all the information.  This led the World Health Organization to coin the term ‘infodemic,’ which speaks to the spread of information, accurate or not, that contributes to an increase in misinformation.  You may have seen celebrities, friends, or family disregarding public health guidelines and felt like you are missing out on a life free from pandemic restrictions that others are appear to be experiencing.  This can create dissonance between not wanting to go against public health guidelines but still wanting to participate in life.

Feelings of FOMO

There are many physical, mental, and emotional indicators of FOMO:

  • Fatigue or tiredness
  • Being less physically active
  • Engaging in compulsive social media use
  • Feeling like you are losing a competition
  • Low motivation
  • Reduced self-esteem
  • Reduced mindfulness
  • Increased social anxiety
  • Loneliness
  • Worrying about missing out on activities on social media

Strategies for Coping with FOMO

Never fear, strategies are here!  There are many strategies that can be used to both prevent and cope with FOMO.

  • Try the Joy of Missing Out (JOMO)!
  • Another alternative to FOMO is FONO – Finding other Nourishing Opportunities. This can be anything that works for you like engaging in a skincare routine, colouring, or cookin
  • A mood tracker can help bring awareness to tracking your feelings throughout the day and looking at how they change throughout a day
  • Setting an alarm can help bring awareness to and limit time spent online and on social media
  • Look at the sunny side: give gratitude a try
    • Add notes of gratitude each day to a jar to remind yourself of all of the things you were grateful for
    • This short video explains the science behind gratitude and gives some easy ways to incorporate gratitude into our lives
  • Practice self-compassion.  Kristin Neff, a leader in self-compassion has many resources available about self-compassion

If you are finding that a fear of missing out is stopping you from doing your regular daily activities, you may want more help.  The Student Wellness Centre has regular groups and workshops as well as counselling support.

Reflection

  1. Below are a couple of questions you can us as reflection prompts:
    What is one strategy you can do now to reduce FOMO?
  2. If you had a friend struggling with FOMO, what advice would you give them or what strategy would you suggest to them?

For the original version of this article, including references, please email the Student Wellness Centre.